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Tacky Treasures
The Mark Eden Bust Developer, the Popener, a rubber band
vest, and more
Nouveau Tacky
Jesus playing football, a Chairman Mao cigarette lighter,
and other delightfully tasteless objects
Tacky Places
Foamhenge, Cooter's Place, Planet Wayside,
and other whimsical places
Tacky Topics
The Tacky Treasures Road Show, Mike the Headless Chicken,
big heads, art cars, salt & pepper shakers, ballerinas abuse
Seasonal Tacky
Naked witch earrings, Love Kubes™, kinky cuffs,
pooping reindeer, Santa piñata, and other holiday treats
Books & Records
Why not eat insects, the Temple City Kazoo
Orchestra, and more
Tacky Links |
Tacky Treasures Road Show 2003
The 2003 Tacky Treasures Road Show was held on the Sunday of the
Memorial Day weekend. Partygoers were encouraged to bring in their
tackiest things for appraisal and possible prizes.
Let's start with dessert...the tackyiest one I've seen in a while.
Before the "show" part of the Tacky Treasures Road Show,
we had a potluck dinner. I must say, as beautiful as this dessert
was, most of it was left uneaten. Was it a sign of aesthetic appreciation,
or just good nutrition, to avoid this dessert? Jumahl and Lynda
brought the dish made of Hostess Snowballs with a parasol on top.
Miss Abigail added color
with marshmallow peeps.
| Here's another popular trend gone too far...the
country craft style. What were they thinking, joining two pigs
at the ass with a heart? I don't want to know. This bestial
display was donated to the museum by Barbara Shine and Bob Lindsay. |
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| These kitty goggles came in handy
at the Kinetic Sculpture Race in April 2003. They were purchased
at Hampden Junque, in the Hampden
area of Baltimore. |
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And the winner is...
...the "Butt Snuffer," a charming little ashtray
in the shape of a chamber pot, with a porcelain ass pointed
skyward inside. Congratulations, Ann Porcella, you found a
winner! |
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Not pictured, but worth mentioning
- The Peter Meter, contributed by my brother Frank, which
was a ruler that he bought at a truck stop. The scale went
from from "just a waterspout" and "should
have been a girl" to "Home Wrecker Size"
and "WOW!" What COULD they be talking about?
- The tacky dessert brought to mind a story told to me by
Chris Romaine, who swears that he once went to a pot luck
supper, and someone brought a dish called a "Bolinkie."
It consisted of a plate of Twinkies, each of them wrapped
in a slice of bologna, held in place with a long toothpick
which had an olive on the top. Some day, I will make this
dish, and picture it in the Tacky Treasures. I'll even eat
it, and perhaps wash it down with a Hawk
Shot.
- A few excerpts were read from Found
Magazine. In this example, someone had found some abandoned
course evaluation forms with the following amazing feedback:
- THE COURSE: "I cannot remember anything about
the course, any more than I could recall the most boring
moments of my life. The educational value was so phenomenally
low that my frustration grew into hatred for her, and
then it became more widespread, affecting my family
and friends, and possibly people I have never met before,
until I finally reached the point where I hated myself
for being there"
- CLASSROOM DYNAMICS: "At times, it seemed that
if someone were to begin speaking in tongues, we all
would have nodded and pretended that it was an insightful
comment, just because someone had actually SAID something."
- ADDITIONAL COMMENTS: "A note about the cats:
the litterbox was in the bathroom. It contained, well,
cat shit, one of the most repulsive substances known
to the human race. If the instructor hadn't wanted us
in the bathroom, she could have selected a less unpleasant
method of signaling it."
- INTELLECTUAL STIMULATION: "When her twenty-five
pound cat clawed me in the genitals."
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A Lil Julie Production