>> Back to Tacky Topics >> Tacky Treasures Road Show Tacky Treasures Road Show 2014Intro - Winners - Prizes - Also Rans The Tacky Treasures Road Show is modeled after the PBS program "Antiques Roadshow," except that in this case the question the appraiser always asks is, "Do you have any idea how tacky this is?" I love the sound of that, so I do it every year. This was the second year that the Tacky Treasures Road Show took place outside of my home. It has outgrown my living room and dining room, where for the past few years, I haven't had enough chairs for all the people who have come. I think I've found the perfect venue: the Silver Spring B&O Train Station. No longer used as a station, it has been restored (by Montgomery Preservation, Inc.) to look as it did in 1945, complete with ticket booth, lockers, phone booth, and a waiting room with comfy benches. There were 22 entries, down again from last year. If we don't get our numbers up again next year, I'll have to consider moving the Tacky Treasures Road Show back to my house. But that would mean I'd have to clean my house, so maybe not. This year's judges were: Jeff Chumley, Carolee Rand, and Betsy Fulford. While they made their deliberations, I displayed the five prizes. I was so glad that I was able to get rid of -- I mean find some things in my collection worthy of serving as prizes in the road show. This show would be nothing if not for the enthusiastic participants who enter the competition. There was stiff competition for the five prizes, and as far as I'm concerned, anyone who didn't win can rightfully say, "I came in sixth." I also want to thank, and give due credit, to everyone who sent me photographs. Key to the photographers' codes on the photos: BC = Bob Cantor; JC = Jennifer Cutting; otherwise, photos are by Julie Mangin The WinnersFirst Place: Twister Game DressJennifer was going to be a judge, and she wanted to dress in style for the role. As soon as I saw her walk in dressed like a game of Twister, I knew that the dress needed to be entered in the show. Fortunately, she was willing to relinquish the duties of a judge. It turned out to be an excellent decision on her part, because she ran away with first prize. I can't imagine anyone more perfect to show off this costume, which she accessorized with red tights and white boots. The keyhole décolletage was a nice touch, as well. Second Place: Tacky PostcardsThis pair of tacky postcards was a winner for first-time road show attendee, Karen Stuart. I think either one could have one on its own, though I suspect that it was the one on the left that did it. The "Any Ass Can Smoke" postcard depicts the backside of a turkey with a lit cigarette sticking out of it. The triangular stub of the turkey's tail looks just like a nose, so a pair of sunglasses and a "gimme" cap makes it look almost human. A tacky way to send a non-tacky message: Don't smoke! As for the second postcard, I've heard tell of fur bearing trout in the cold waters up North. This is proof that they actually exist, although what this one is doing with cheetah fur I'll never know. Third Place: Nose Pepper MillKathy Brumberger brought a pepper mill in the shape of a nose. I haven't seen many tacky pepper mills in my quest for tacky treasures, so I thank her for adding to the annals of tackiness. Neither Kathy nor I would use such a thing at the dinner table. It's just too disgusting! Why would anyone use a human body part to deliver a condiment to their food? There is already a frightening number of salt and pepper shakers in the form of noses, butts, boobs, and penises (not to mention skulls, outhouses, toilets, and pregnant women). I have only two tacky pepper mills in my collection. If I discover any more, I'll have to start a page called "Pepper Mills I'll Never Grind." Fourth Place: Hoof AshtraysMy best guess is that these are buffalo hooves, but lacking DNA testing, I don't know how anyone could prove otherwise. These were found in Ellen's late mother-in-law's basement. They may have been part of her husband's "man cave." Ashtrays are not usually sold in pairs, so the guy must have really loved buffalo hooves or smoking, or both at the same time. I have a deer hoof ashtray in my collection, but the legs are too skinny to make an effective receptacle for cigarette ashes. Buffalo legs are much stouter, so these may have been more than just a novelty item. And they are tacky, to boot. Or to hoof. Whatever. Fifth Place: Baby Head LampOh, the inhumanity! Disembodied baby heads float around the lamp, glowing eerily from the light bulb. I hope this was not for use in a child's bedroom, because I think it could easily give an adult a nightmare! Liz says that it was represented to her as "art," which we all know is in the eye of the beholder. But so is "tacky." Just saying... The PrizesThe winners, in order of their rank in the contest, were invited to select from the array of prizes.
The Also-Rans
That's all folks! |
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Copyright © 2000-2020, Julie Mangin. All Rights Reserved. | July 24, 2020 |